Christmas looked very different this year. My entire life, childhood through adulthood, I’ve celebrated the holidays with my great, big extended family. Every year, at some point during December, we gather at my grandmother’s house, eat a glorious meal, sing carols, and play dirty Santa. It’s what we’ve always done, until now.

This year was much smaller, much simpler. There were just a few of us. The food and company were still great, but it didn’t feel like all the Christmases before. So, when I heard that Disney/Pixar was releasing a new movie, I won’t lie… I felt a little excited–like a kid at Christmas. My oldest nephew shared in my excitement as we talked about getting to watch the movie on Christmas Day.

After eating a little breakfast and opening gifts, we snuggled up on the couch–the whole family–and watched Soul.

From the very beginning, I was hooked. Part of the reason it touched me so much was that I feel like I’m living Joe’s life–waiting for my big break so I can finally start to live my life. Oooh what this movie has reminded me. The timing couldn’t be more perfect. There’s no better time to realize that you’ve been doing it all wrong like the beginning of a new year.

6 Things Pixar’s SOUL Taught Me

1. You should enjoy whatever you do.

I’m a Type A personality who gives 110% to everything I do, but sometimes when I’m pushing myself too hard, I forget to simply lean into my passion. I try to sculpt, bend, and mold it to my own agenda. Instead, I learned–like Joe from the movie–that I need to just enjoy doing what I do. My goals and deadlines can make me forget the reason why I love writing. Instead of asking what my passion (writing) can do for me externally, I need to focus more on what it does for me internally.

My passion gives me joy when I let it.

2. Don’t listen to the haters.

“You can’t crush a soul here. That’s what Earth is for.” – 22, in Soul

One thing that you quickly learn by being a creative is that there are a lot of haters. It’s amazing how many people will come out of everywhere to put you down as soon as you begin following your passion. It’s as if nothing would make them happier than to rob you of your joy.

Even well-intentioned people, like Joe’s mother, can make you feel like rubbish. When your family and friends wonder why you spend so much time doing something that doesn’t always pay off, you’ll begin having some doubts too. But at the end of the day, we’re in it for different reasons. Most creatives would have stopped if they could, but they can’t. It’s part of what makes life worth living.

I wish I could tell you there’s some way to block all the negativity people like to spew online or shield yourself from well-meaning loved ones, but there’s not. All we can do is build encouraging communities and virtual walls around our hearts, allowing only those who matter inside.

When dealing with negative people, I always go back to the great Dr. Seuss:

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

3. You must pursue your passion without becoming obsessed.

In the movie, there’s a wise hippie who reconnects lost souls with their spark. He says:

“Some people can’t let go of their own anxieties and obsessions, leaving them lost and disconnected with life.”

People can easily become hyper-focused on their goals. We spend so much time wondering, dreaming, and working on getting ahead that we forget to live in the present. We forget what it’s like to truly live. When your joy to write, create, build, or work becomes an obsession, you will become disconnected with life.

“Is all this living really worth dying for?” – Soul

When we’re obsessed with keeping our deadlines, building our businesses, getting that next promotion, or moving into our dream neighborhood, we’re missing the point. We’ll never keep our spark if we’re going so fast it can’t stay lit.

Your work can build you a wonderful life, but we must remember what is important in that life. Chances are, we aren’t always focusing on the right things.

4. Learn to jazz your way through life.

I love listening to jazz. There’s something inspiring and life-giving about the spontaneity of it–the soul of it. It’s as if the music has taken a life of its own, and the listener is taken along for the ride. The character 22 in Soul finds her spark by jazzing through the day. She skips down the street, enjoys a slice of pizza, plays on a street vent, and watches the leaves as they slowly dance to the ground. She wonders if her purpose is to be a skywatcher. Every tiny, little thing we take for granted brings her joy, which reminds us how much we’re all missing by rushing through life.

Everyone is always looking for their purpose or chasing their dreams, but we should be training ourselves to bask in the simple joys of life.

5. Don’t be that fish.

Let me let you in on a little secret, even if you obtain all that you’ve ever dreamed of, it will not be enough. You know, money doesn’t buy you happiness and all that jazz. Even if your dream has nothing to do with money, the theory still applies.

In the movie, Joe finally does something he’s always dreamed of–a life-defining thing that will finally mark the beginning of his life, according to him. But after he’s done it, he realizes he doesn’t feel any different. He worked his whole life for that one moment, and it was a let down.

On the other side of it, he realizes that conquering that goal didn’t change him. It didn’t make him any more remarkable than he already was. He was a talented musician with or without that one night. After everyone had gone home, someone he truly admires tells him a story. I’ll do my best to reiterate it here, she said:

“I once heard this story about a young fish. He swims up to an older fish and says, ‘I’m trying to find this thing called the ocean.’

‘The ocean?’ asks the older fish, ‘the ocean is what you’re in right now.’

‘This? This is just water. What I want is the ocean.'” – Soul

When we’re constantly searching for something else, we miss the forest for the trees. We forget to see what’s right in front of us. We take our blessing, our families, our communities for granted. My hope is to never be that fish.

6. Your spark isn’t your passion; it’s your joy.

Throughout the whole movie, the characters keep talking about this abstract thing–a spark. Everyone needs one. It means they’re ready to begin living. Some people lose it to the monotony, the haters, or their relentless goal-setting, while others, like 22, had trouble ever finding it.

Your spark of life isn’t your purpose or dream or passion. Your spark has nothing to do with what you do, but everything to do with how you do it.

Your spark is your zest for life. It’s your positive perspective, your belief in something good, your certainty that all will be well, even when it feels like it won’t.

Joe says that something always seems to go wrong when he’s on the verge of obtaining his dream, but in reality, he’s missed a thousand life-giving moments because he kept thinking about his distant dream instead of savoring the epic now.

Don’t settle for anything less than a blazing fire for life. Our purpose is to live a great life that brings us abundant joy.

It’s a beautiful life if we’ll let it be.

Signs You’ve Found Your Spark

• You look forward to waking up.
• You love to laugh.
• You sometimes feel like skipping through the park.
• You smile at people.
• You enjoy moments spent talking to strangers.
• You take time to enjoy walking.
• Your priorities are on the important things.
• You look up at the trees and the sky, and you actually do smell the flowers.
• You stop trying to control everything.
• Your daily plan is to live joyfully.

So, I’ll end with this: How will you spend your life?

I hope you’ll answer like Joe… Living every minute of it.